Saturday 30 May 2009

Beaker Jobs for Beaker People

We are most concerned by the leaflet put out by a political party campaigning in the European elections.
First of all, anyone with experience in the building industry would have to be concerned that the builders in this photo may well scratch their hands on a nasty rough brick, or struggle to lift a standard-sized lintel.  Who knows, they might even be allergic to cement, builders' sand or brick dust.  One can already say that, without any of them wearing safety gloves, none of them is equipped for serious handling of heavy building materials.  Indeed, one of them appears to be wearing a Mickey Mouse watch.
And let's be honest, the one on the right is not going to go far, trying to climb scaffold, is he?
While the one on the left appears to have his hard hat on back to front.  Indeed, the general impression is that these are the finalists in an audition for a Village People tribute band.
In summary - are these real builders?  Look at their lilywhite hands.  We doubt it.
BUT
let's take the photo as it is.  The hi-viz, worn so gleefully on men who are clearly not builders, can only tell us one thing - they are clearly Beaker Folk.  This gives the message of this political party an even more dubious impact.  For if they want to repatriate from these shores everyone who is not a Beaker Person, who will be left?  Not the Celts, who so cruelly displaced the Beaker Folk to Cornwall, Ireland and Husborne Crawley.  Not the Romans, who demonstrated the prototypical Italian approach to conflict by putting all gears in reverse in their 5th century scarper to their underfloor-heated homes.  Not the Johnny-Come-Lately Anglo-Saxons, Norse or Normans - hardly been here two millenia.  No, it will just be Hnaef, Young Keith, Drayton, Burton, and a group of namby-pamby builders.  I've seen the future and it doesn't work.  Or, at any rate, it doesn't lay bricks.

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