Monday, 1 April 2013

Those Biblical Headlines in Full

Caiaphas announces 10% increase in needle sizes, 10% reduction in camels.

"In my father's house are many rooms" - Jesus of Nazareth faces unprecedented benefit cut.

Meek suffer inheritance tax increase.

Can the Ark of the Covenant cause tumours? (Answer - Yes)

Lazarus told, "Forget the sores, you're fit to work." Dives gets unexpected final demand.

"That ointment could have been sold and the money given to a rich person" - Judas

Jeconiah warns Nebuchadnezzar - "Jewish spears are capable of striking the far side of the Jordan. Just. If we try really hard".

Zadok the Priest resigns as Absolom takes over as manager of Jerusalem Utd.

Eve naked - those racy shots by Michaelangelo.


  1. Overfishing in Sea of Galilee could lead to ecological havoc, including thunder, lightning, and earthquakes.

  2. Christians encourage unhealthy diet - all that bread and wine is bad for you.


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