Times are tight, and the budget's a bit stretched. So we're all going to have to learn to tighten our belts, as the cold wind of economic stagnation blows around our mixedly-metaphorical ankles. It's going to be hard, but we're all in this together.
Which is why we've introduced First Class Worship. This gives the worshipper who wants a little more space, some free biscuits, at-seat service with a selection of liqueurs and a padded leather seat the chance to worship in a relaxed and yet timelessly stylish way.
In the separate First Class Worship compartment of the new Moot House, you can enjoy the peace which the World cannot give - at least, not unless you pay extra for it. If the Beaker Quire is as out of tune as ever, or the sermon is a big pile of pants, you can use the in-seat MP3 system and complimentary headphones to select something more spiritually uplifting.
Although you'd ideally want to book in advance, maybe to reserve the best seat over by the fountain, you have the option to upgrade at any time the appalling din of children and smell of ordinary customers - sorry, passengers - sorry, worshippers gets too much.
We hasten to add that Standard Class Worship remains as it has always been. Dreary, uninspiring, and with a view of the Worship Focus partially obstructed by the First Class Worship VIP lounge. But comfort yourselves, my people. For even the dogs may eat the Bath Oliver crumbs that fall from the First Class post-worship time.
First Class worship. For the discerning worshipper who got lucky with the Post Office.