Monday, 3 November 2014

Dawkins Honey Day

In the Beaker Religion, the Sun is a tortoise
tea-light holder, flying on a honey jar.
A Solar Eclipse is when the honey gets confiscated
by a cosmic airport official.
It is, I am delighted to discover from Twitter, Dawkins Honey Day.

A day when we can reflect that, twelve months on, we are still not allowed to take small pots of honey on planes.

A day to remember that a brave airport security guard didn't know who, and how important, Richard Dawkins was.

A day to remember that the late Osama Bin Laden has won. Although I'm not sure what he's won really. Or what an atheist could ever have imagined a dead man could have won. But still. Well done, Osama. All have won, and all will have prizes. Except if the prizes are small, air-freighted jars of honey. In which case all will have to make do with handwriten bits of card with "well done" written on them.

To mark Dawkins Honey Day, we are issuing special "busy bee" badges. They represent a bee in an airport security outfit, demanding a pot of honey from an innocent author.

We will be eating honey on toast tonight, remembering that, if the EU's pesticide control regulations don't reverse the current outbreaks of hive collapse and varroa, Osama will have won. Forever.

A Liturgy for Honey Night

Archdruid: O honey

All: Oh, sugar, sugar.

Archdruid: Sweets for my sweet

All: Sugar for my honey.

Archdruid; Honey, I miss you.

All: And I'm being good.

Archdruid: Can I have that honey, please sir?

RD: Don't you know who I am? I'm the world's greatest atheist. Why don't I have a knighthood?

All: Tell him about the honey, Mummy!

Archdruid: Go into the world, and spread the good news.

1 comment :

  1. I don't know if this helps, but you can take jam in your hold baggage!


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