Friday, 26 June 2015

Farage From the Madding Crowd

"That's it!" said Bathsheba Everdene, the young lady-farmer. "I said that I would run Wetherbury Farm. I promised that I would be Bailey, and Master. Yet I keep saying I will marry unsuitable alpha males. I can't do that and be a strong feminist icon. Therefore I am going to stand down as the farmer in charge of Wetherbury."

"He-he!" said Christian Cantle, "Miss Everdene has resigned!"

"Resigned? I never said resigned," said the young, attractive, cherry-lipped [throws bucket of cold water over Thomas Hardy] woman. "I am merely putting my future into the hands of the owners of the farm."

"But isn't that you?" asked Bailey Pennyways.

The rosebud-mouthed temptress gave him 2 guineas severance pay. And told him to get off her land before she set the dogs on him.

1 comment :

  1. 2 guineas pay? I would have sent him the dogs' dentistry bills


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