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Tuesday, 25 August 2015

Days of Elisha

Good news of a kind. We've managed to corner the sloth bear in the doily sheds, and have started negotiations. He's demanded a helicopter to get him over the border to Hertfordshire, and a bucket of ants.

He's particularly grumpy over this whole Bible-reading business. We're a progressive, liberal, inclusive community that welcomes all faith and nuns. Whereas he's an Evangelical sloth bear.

So he reckons we have too many Bible readings at services. Can we cut them down a bit, he asks, and sing more songs?

8 comments :

  1. Given that he is Evangelical, I'd have thought that he'd want more, not less bible readings, But I know that Evangelical churches and people believe in the bible differently from us mere mortals, they believe it in a very literal way, with little room for interpretation. So, I suspect the Evangelical Sloth Bear is actually complaining about the choice of readings and the preaching connected to them. Perhaps is he were to be locked into a room with a liberal theologian he'd mend his ways.

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    Replies
    1. Have you not been to an Evangelical service lately? One reading, two if you're lucky, while the liberals and catholics are having three and a psalm.

      Delete
    2. Have you not been to an Evangelical service lately? One reading, two if you're lucky, while the liberals and catholics are having three and a psalm.

      Delete
    3. Have you not been to an Evangelical service lately? One reading, two if you're lucky, while the liberals and catholics are having three and a psalm.

      Delete
  2. Given that he is Evangelical, I'd have thought that he'd want more, not less bible readings, But I know that Evangelical churches and people believe in the bible differently from us mere mortals, they believe it in a very literal way, with little room for interpretation. So, I suspect the Evangelical Sloth Bear is actually complaining about the choice of readings and the preaching connected to them. Perhaps is he were to be locked into a room with a liberal theologian he'd mend his ways.

    ReplyDelete
  3. A WHOLE reading? Or just a verse, minus context, deconstructed into its component syllables over the course of a 45 min "talk"?

    ReplyDelete
  4. If he wants more songs, tell him there's a vacancy on 2nd cornet at our Salvation Army Corps

    ReplyDelete

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