Tuesday, 22 September 2015

Lament for the Last Day of Summer

Archdruid: The last of the summer rays falls on the grateful earth

All: Sorry, Eileen? It's pouring with rain.

Archdruid: And the earth revels in the last warmth of summer.

All: Eileen, can we chuck another pallet on the fire? It's freezing.

Archdruid: Let us bask in the sun and rejoice while we may! Gather ye rosebuds and eat of the fruit of the land!

All: The tomatoes are months behind. The rosebuds all rotted in the rain. And the hottest summer in history, as predicted by the Daily Express (yet again), and even the Telegraph, has been a washout.

Archdruid: Then let us take one last summer dance on the blessed grass!

All: Lower Meadow is under water. The floor in the Orchard is covered in fungus. There's nowhere safe to dance.

Archdruid: What about the tennis court?

All: Covered in moss. It's terrifying.

Archdruid: Then let us cower under cover, sing our songs of woe, light up the wood-burner, throw chair legs on the fire and lament the total wash out that the summer has been. OK, Kirsty - take it away.....


  1. I presume that you're working on the Equinox the BBC tells us that today is the first day of Autumn. My Church diary makes no mention of it - and they should know (in touch with the divine etc). So, it's obvious that your pagan ceremonies and liturgies go by 'Old Moore's Almanac' rather than a a scientific approach such as licking a finger and sticking it in the air to find if the wind has switched to the North. As we all know, the Autumn and Winter originate in the land of the Picts and Scots along with Ms Sturgeon - whose frosty attitude means a winter of discontent, threats and disruption to parliament if stamping her size 9's doesn't get her way.

    And I note the failure of your liturgical dance, due to unforeseen circumstances? Are you planning on making your 'seer' redundant?

  2. Summers End is not until Samhain.

  3. Whereas I think it's been autumn since September began, like the meteorologists.


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