Beaker Folk encircle the car parked on the pavement.
Archdruid: Let us judge not, lest we be judged.
All: But let's face it, it's pretty tempting, innit?
Archdruid: Shall we risk walking out into the road to get round this selfish get?
All: Though the traffic is heavy and two of us have baby buggies.
Archdruid: For wide is the road that leads to destruction.
All: But it's a sensible place to park.
Archdruid: And narrow is the path that leads to salvation.
All: And that twerp in the Fiat isn't making life any better.
Archdruid: Can you feel the selfishness?
All: It flows along our arms, like unto the water that runs down Mount Hermon.
Archdruid: Can you feel the stupid?
All: It burns! It burns!
All may remove their right index fingers.
Archdruid: Let us give the car a blessing, in the hope that the blessing will pass to the driver.
Beaker-bearers lift their beakers
Charlii: I pour out the Beaker of Grape Juice for fruitfulness.
Young Keith: I pour our the Beaker of Honey for sweetness.
Hnaef: I pour out the Beaker of Grease, for smoother starting in cold weather.
Burton: I pour out the Beaker of Milk, for youthful reactions.
Stacey: I pour out the Beaker of Tripe, for this bloke's judgement.
Kylie: I apply the Beaker of Fermented Fish Intestines, for better eyesight.
Kayleigh: And I apply the Half-eaten Kebab of Completing the Exercise.
Driver: Oi! What you doin' to my car?
Archdruid: Quick! Scarper!