Tadpole Trouble

A simple rule for future reference. If you're going to try and achieve spiritual one-ness with a creature, at least make sure you're spiritually and intellectually its superior.
Egweld is currently sitting by the pond, chewing algae and looking forward to the day when he is a frog. Every now and then he decides to go for a lap of the pond and has to be dragged out, because he has never learnt to swim. He's also saying that all his psychological problems (which existed before yesterday's ill-fated ceremonies) are due to a traumatic hatching, and to the realisation that his father is a natterjack toad.
That toad business is even more concerning. Natterjacks being a protected species, Egweld is claiming we can't even remove him from the pond for his own good, and has employed lawyers to get an injunction forbidding members of the community from the surrounds of the pond on the grounds that "they keep looking at me funny". The Equal Rights people are even now on the case, demanding the right for Egweld to have the Moot House flooded so he can worship in the environment to which he is accustomed.