On charitable giving

Strange to be issuing a post at this time, but we've only just retrieved Marston from the shopping centre.

During Lent, Marston has given up paying for parking in Central Milton Keynes.  And he decided to give the money he'd saved this way to charity.

But he also remembered that there was something in the Good Book about not doing good so others think you're good - even yourself.

Due to a combination of poor recall, an amazingly poor hemispherical co-ordination and stunning literalism, Marston managed to get his right foot not to know what his left hand was doing.  With the result that he was unable to drive his car - just sat there in a state of motor-nerve turmoil and hemispherical confusion.  It may be the only case we've heard of where a driver was clamped while sitting in his car crying, with his head on the steering wheel.  Eventually even the car clampers took pity on him - incredible as that may sound - and we were able to mount a rescue from the pound.  But at least he doesn't have to worry about what to do with all the money he's saved.  The clampers have seen to that.