The Martian Chronicles

*erxquizit: "That's funny, !veg'l. All the communications from Earth have ceased."

!veg'l  "That is odd, *erxquizit. And it makes me feel slightly saddened, oh warty friend, as I was looking forward to the League Cup Final."

*erxquizit: "I wonder what has happened, oh tentacular companion. Were there any clues as to their fate?"

!veg'l  "Have you examined the last communications that the terrestrial evolved ape-offspring sent, oh seven-eyed buddy?"

*erxquizit: "I am just calling it up now, oh hermaphroditic fellow-Martian. It is a Tweet."

!veg'l  "And what does it say, oh iron-based lifeform of my heart?"

*erxquizit: "Very strange, my two-thirds double cousin twice over. It just says 'Asteroid strike? The Mayans never saw that coming. May as well have that Findus lasagne lol.'"

!veg'l  "They were a strange race, oh my red-dusted friend. But I will miss them. I wonder what God will inflict on that poor planet next?"