Knew it was trouble when I heard the Daily Mail were going to cover our lunchtime "Bring and Share" meal. I mean, sure we are the Northern Home Counties' number one neo-reconstructionist pre-pagan Christian Community, but surely, I thought, there were other, bigger celebrations to attend?
That Ross Slater turned up, ate three quiches and a couple of cold pizzas. Then announced he'd not brought anything with him, and how come we were so gullible? And he wouldn't join in with the "Peruvian Gloria". Said it had probably been introduced into the country by asylum seekers.
Face it,Eileen -you are gullible. That Beluga Caviare that I brought, and that you scoffed, was newts' eyes. And the lumps in the "authentic pan-scouse that I brought in my cauldron were Wodewose droppings. I'm guessing that Ross would probably prefer the Israeli Mass
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