Moses Invents a Sophisticated Drink

And it came to pass, as soon as he came nigh unto the camp, that he saw the calf, and the dancing: and Moses’ anger waxed hot, and he cast the tables out of his hands, and brake them beneath the mount.

And he took the calf which they had made, and burnt it in the fire, and ground it to powder, and strawed it upon the water, and made the children of Israel drink of it.

Which Moses thought was a punishment. But the children of Israel were post-modern consumerists, and thought that mineral water with gold flakes was a "sophisticated and refreshing hydration solution." And agreed that, although it was able to bring a lift to any refreshment occasion, it was best to drink with white fish or chicken.