Definitely Not Greenbelt 2016

Once again the Beaker Folk have travelled up to Graham Heartland's "Not GB" festival.

Got here early yesterday morning. Albeit turned out we really were a bit early. No stewards, no tents, no cars, no happy campers. Just owls.

Scary creatures, owls. We locked the coach door and sang comforting songs till day broke. I say "comforting". Six hours of " Kum By Ah" got a bit much, to be honest. Then a bloke came and knocked at the coach door.

Turned out because of the hi viz, he assumed we were the construction crew for the authentic "Greenbelt 1986-style" toilets. And I didn't like to argue. Not least because, with the Beaker Folk busy digging enormous holes in the ground, I could nip off and put the Archdruidical Tentiplex up in peace, without Marston tying himself up with guy ropes while helping. Funny thing, last year, the number of times he did it you'd think he enjoyed me having to untie him while swearing at him.

Did make me wonder why he was still putting his tent up by day 4.

Anyway. They all asked how come I'd dragged them out into the virtual countryside to engage in manual labour. So I told them they were actually digging ritual pits into which people would later be making offerings. Seemed to persuade them.

So today we've just been to early morning worship with the Isle of Wight community. They're like the Iona Community except every act of worship ends with ritually cursing Ofsted.

If you want to attend Not GB 2016, you can find Graham's blog here. The Twitter feed is here.

And most importantly #notgb2016 is a nonprofit, virtual organisation. All of its revenue goes to the Big Issue Foundation. And you can just give here.