Service for National Fish and Chip Day

Hymn: Oh cod, our hope in ages past

Archdruid: Can we have kippers for breakfast

All: Moggy dear, Moggy dear.

Archdruid: What's that flapping in the back row of the quire?

Quire: Basses.

Archdruid: Well, they've had their chips.

Quire: They wanted to sing some "metal" hymns.

Archdruid: OK maybe they're rock salmon?

Hymn: There's a plaice, where the streets shine

Archdruid: My friend Syd ran a mission for fishers of the species Anguilla Anguilla

All: We can see what's coming....

Archdruid: It was an eeling ministry.

Tumbleweed blows across the Moot House

Hymn: Come and do the Conger

Reading: Jonah and the Whale

All: FISH!!!!!

Archdruid: Seriously?

All: It's what it says.

A tonsured person brings the Holy Ants Eggs to the Worship Focus (a fish bowl)

Archdruid: Is that a monkfish?

All: No. He's a fryer.

Hymn: Tell out, my sole

Archdruid: My pet fish is black and white and has only 7 scales.

All: No. Surely not.

Archdruid: It's a piano tuna.

Hymn: Hark what a sound, and too divine for herring

Dismissal

Archdruid: Go in plaice.

All: The Mackerel's ended.

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