Psalm for Sorting Out and Hanging Up the Christmas Lights

Oh wow, how many are the knots

and to what degree are these lights tangled.

I tug them to see if they will come apart

and they huddle together, 

like unto the knot that is Gordian

like unto a nest of serpents that twine in the darkness

If that is what serpents do

I try to stay away from serpents.

I look back to last Epiphany

when I put the lights into their box

consigning them to darkness

even as the light of the year grew.

And I said to myself, "let us not thrown them in randomly

like unto last year 

and the many years of our forefathers and foremothers before us

even like unto those who went down unto the grave

in despair that they could not untangle their bling.

And so I carefully coiled the wires

Keeping the plastic icicles separate

cunningly using those little twisty bits of plastic-covered wire

so that no two wires would be entwined.

And now look at what I have.

A nest like unto a consultant's chart

constructed by Dominic Cummings 

and a superforecaster 

with a hangover.

A solid mass of wire and plastic 

and there is no sign of an end.

When will I see the end?

And yet the end is not nigh.

I struggle all afternoon, even as the light fadeth

and still I have not a single string.

The lights come on in my hand as the timer cuts in

which at noontime I said I would have them hung up

long before this happened.

And still there is no end.

The day turns to evening

the sheep return to the fold

the chickens come home to roost

and I have found the end.

As darkness falls

like unto the Valley of the Shadow of death

I stretch out the strings of lights 

until I have the lights apart.

In gladness I climb the stepladder

hanging up the lights

to celebrate the birth of a king in the middle east

through blue LEDs and plastic things that could resemble icicles.

Some of the icicles are missing.

In vain do I search the loft for the missing icicles

But none are found.

Not in a box

nor on the insulating foam.

And so I resolve to give it in.

90% of the icicles are there.

And maybe nobody will look too closely.

Next year, I will do it better.

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