Today we celebrate the Feast of Artificial Additives.
May our praises be as saccharine as a late-80s praise 'n' worship cassette. may we be as monosodium glutamate and Cola Lite to the world.
May we see the Sunshine Yellow rise for us, and we'll have the aspartame of our lives.
As the Psalmist put it: In the front are the singers, after them the musicians, and then come the girls with the Tartrazine.
Let us eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we dye.
This afternoon we will be observing the Ceremony of Palpitations.