Wednesday 10 January 2007

A post-christendom Worship Paradigm


The cyber-coenobitic religious community for the 21st century - and now with added tealights!
Where creation is respected; where the divine is encountered; where trees are sung to. Where no bunny goes un-hugged. Where Druids worship in the oak groves of Aspley Heath. Where mistletoe is cut with a gold-covered stainless steel sickle (pure gold is just too soft....) Where even thick places are thin. Just five miles from Milton Keynes, handy for the Midland Mainline (change at Bedford), the Bedford-Bletchley Line and M1 Junction 13. Or, for the more affluent eco-tourist, there's Cranfield Aerodrome.

More traditional than Celtic Christianity (like that's hard...); more Arran Sweaters than the Highlands and Islands; more facial hair than a convention of Dubliners fans (and that's just the Archdruid).
The origins of our community came out of discontent with the spurious nature of modern-day "Celtic Christianity". A movement that thinks the best way of recreating the environment in which hairy monks sailed across wild oceans, conducted three-hour services in Latin and were martyred for their faith when they weren't being flogged by the abbot for minor indisciplines - is for people to sing along to dreamy choruses while accompanied by badly-played guitars and flutes.
Looking for a more authentic spiritual experience led us to the Beaker Folk. Consider what we know about the Beaker Folk:

  • They were earlier than the Celts, so they must have been even more exotic and spiritual.


  • They built Stonehenge.


  • So they must have had druids.


  • And the use of stones in worship. (We tend towards pebbles rather than 20 ton sarsen blocks. Easier to move).


  • We like the word "folk". Makes you feel all comfy and arran-sweaterish.


  • They probably had tea lights


  • They were peaceful and gentle - except when massacring their neighbours to steal their wives and sheep.


  • Even better - we don't really know very much about them at all. So anything we imagine they did - must be right.