And so another Apocalypse goes by and we're all still here. My personal theory is that we won't know which is the real one until Fox announces it's signed for the rights.
But you know whom I feel sorry for? It's the young woman in the picture in the Independent, wearing a T-shirt that reads "King Jesus Returns, May 11 2011. I mean, Young Keith is going around proudly wearing his Fu Fighters " Broken Leg Tour" T-shirt from the Bowl. And in years too come he'll be even prouder, as it gets more tatty, to wear it at other gigs.
But a T-shirt declaring the end of the world for a date in the past? I mean, you can't just rock up to the next forecast Apocalypse saying "yeah, I followed the return of King Jesus before it got trendy."
So I'm producing the "Apocalypse Tour" souvenir T-shirt. With every predicted end of the world, up to "E-Bible Fellowship, October 7 2015. Including " Halley's Comet, 1066; "Great Fire of London, 1966" and "Syria - arrangements to be announced shortly."
So get your Beaker Apocalypse Tour T-shirts now.
Limited offer while stocks last. When we're gone, we're gone.