Two hours. Only use ChatGPT if you're truly desperate.
1) A congregation member has offered you a second-hand bookcase. Not because he's fly-tipping. He just thought it would be useful as he's recently ordered a nice one.
a) How loudly should you shout "no"? (to the nearest decibel)
b) What are you going to do with the three you already have?
2) You have squeezed in so many services on a Sunday, to ensure everyone gets one, that some are now scheduled to start before the previous one ends. Do you have a TARDIS? Or are you just struggling to please everyone?
3) If Bryan in Little Tipping hates Gervais in Pigwell Magna, and Felix in Chipping St Stephen hates Marjorie in Boswell St Jude - why do you keep sharing the Peace at benefice services? (bonus points for explaining why you have benefice services)
4) After driving 87 miles on a typical Sunday, you can hear squeaking. Is it you, or the car?
5) You're considering consolidating all your PCCs into one giant PCC. Have you also thought of therapy?
6) All these retired clergy who are apparently keeping the rural church going - have you ever met one? Or is it just me?
7) [Methodist ministers only] On a scale of 9 to 10 - how lonely are you?
8) [Anglican ministers only] Don't you wish Justin Welby had cared about rural churches as well? Please do not use swear words
9) Explain the latest exciting new strategy to reorganize pastoral care in your diocese / region / county in diagrammatic form. Try to use no more than 4 dimensions.
10) Regarding that exciting new strategy. How soon do you plan to move to a place with a less exciting new strategy?
11) Sir John's income is £4 million pounds per year. The average house in your area is worth £3 million pounds. 10% of the people in the village come to church. How are you struggling to replace a light bulb in the loo?