Archdruid: Welcome to a very special service of Pouring-Out of Beakers. Now does everyone know what day it is?
Hnaef: Is it..... [dramatic pause]... Agincourt?
A flight of arrows whistle through the Moot House, pinning Burton Dasset to the wall.
Archdruid: No, not yet
Hnaef: Mae'n ddrwg gen i hogiau, rhaid i chi ddod yn ol dydd Sul.
The tune Cwm Rhonda can be heard, mournfully fading into the distance.
Charlii: It's Trafalgar Day!
The prow of a first-rate ship of the line juts into the Moot House.
Archdruid: Far more important.
Nelson: Kiss me, Hardy!
Hardy: That kiss is gone where none can tell -
Not even those who felt its spell: It cannot have died; that know we well.
Somewhere it pursues its flight,
One of a long procession of sounds
Travelling aethereal rounds
Far from earth's bounds In the infinite.
All: You've booked the wrong Thomas Hardy!
Thomas Mastermain Hardy: Avast, ye landlubbers! Set sail for Portsmouth, Mr Loveday!
Archdruid: Suddenly the Moot House seems to be full of the smell of herring. No, it's Back to the Future Day!
All: A day to celebrate the great things we've achieved.
Archdruid: Who needs hoverboards when we have drones that can blow up weddings, at the touch of a button from the other side of the world?
All: Who needs a fax in every room when your work is constantly on your smartphone?
Archdruid: Who needs Biff when you've got Katie Hopkins?
All: Why have self-tying shoelaces when you can melt the ice caps?
Andy McCluskey: The Back to the Future we anticipated has been cancelled.
Marty McFly: Doc, we've gotta get outta here. It makes the 80s look sensible.
Archdruid: Now we have a minute's silence as we remember that most of us saw the original at the the pictures.
Burton: I did think Kate Bush was sweet in the video they showed as a trailer.
Kate Bush: Cloudbustin', Daddy.
Hymn: Power of Love
Archdruid: You fools! That's the "Frankie" version.
Holly Johnson: I'll get me coat...
Archdruid: Wherever you're from, whenever you wish it could be - it's here and now. It's all you can be sure of. Make the most of it and make it better.
Hymn: The Power of Love
Archdruid: Jennifer Rush! Get out of here!
Jennifer Rush: OK, Eileen. Doc, let's fire up the De Lorean!