UCB have apparently been putting out sad tweets regarding a poll that apparently said 80% of Christians think Christian broadcasting. They've been asking what we think about it.
Now, I've racked my brains over this. And the honest truth is that I've no idea what Christian broadcasting - at least in England - is like. I've seen American televangelists, long and merry enough ago now, who would ask you to put your hand on the screen to be healed (while putting your other hand in your pocket). But what is broadcasting this side of the Pond like? I've no idea.
But I've a stereotype in my mind. And maybe that's their problem. The stereotype has cheesily grinning, fresh-faced Christians - like well-scrubbed Simon Mayos - cheerily telling us how great life is, in between playing Matt Redman records and interviewing Delia Smith. And the funny thing is that (a) I'm sure that's just my deluded idea and (b) I quite like Simon Mayo, Matt Redman and Delia Smith. But I still couldn't bring myself to tune into UCB.
In fact, being honest and just between you and me - I've no idea whether UCB hasa radio station, TV channel, both or neither.
I have another sneaking suspicion, which is that if there's a Scottish Christian broadcaster, it's probably Strict Presbyterian Broadcasting - twenty-four hours of stern lectures on sin and guilt every day, followed by an epilogue where they tell us it's actually a sin to own a radio. And it won't be much better in Hell.
The only consolation I have is that if there were an Atheist Channel, it would be even worse. Blokes in anoraks and failed comedians - and even comedians in failed anoraks - telling us there's no point to life, but don't touch that dial as there'll be another bloke in an anorak telling us life is futile after the break. But due to the boring nature of the broadcasting, there won't be any adverts - just some trailers for upcoming futility.
On the whole I think I'll stick to Eastenders. It is also futile, but at least they won't put on cheesy smiles.
