Friday, 8 June 2012

Blessing of Squonks

A strange Occasion all round.

You know, we get asked to bless some odd things. Various types of relationships, of course. But also Harley Davidson motorbike, a DVD of "Love Actually", a cricket bat, Thursday, Bruegemann's "Texts Under Negotiation" and Corby, to name but several. But Squonks?

It all came about because "Filling Up of Beakers" had been declared pointless, as the beakers have filled up all on their own in the rain today. So naturally, with time on my hands, I asked if anybody wanted anything blessed. And somebody said - why not the Squonks?

Well, as it turns out, there was one particularly good reason why not the Squonks. Being particularly ugly creatures, they don't understand why anyone would want to bless them. So we explained it was because they were God's creatures, just like the creature with the horns and the tail that Young Keith mysteriously turned up with the other day. But the Squonks assumed there was some nefarious reason why we wanted to bless them. So when I got near them with the Blessing Bowl, they ran away. Naturally we ran after them with the Net of Aspergement, and eventually succeeded in catching them.

But, of course, you all know the problem with catching Squonks.

You feel such a fool, sprinkling blessed water onto a puddle of tears. 

1 comment :

  1. I googled Squonk and found out about them. The description as poor sad creatures, mythical or otherwise means that blessing them, would be a blessing to them.

    However, the scary thing is that it's also a scientific term:

    "Squonks are also known in chemistry and biology. Some substances are stable in solution or some other "wild" form but cannot be isolated or captured without actually catalyzing their own polymerization or decomposition ("dissolving in their own tears"). For example, a molecule containing a carboxylic acid moiety and an acid labile moiety might be stable when initially prepared as the salt (e.g., barium prephenate) but unstable as the free acid (prephenic acid)".

    Now I'm not against science, but if they are creating Squonks in test tubes, that smacks of 'trying to be God'. There is to much of it about, so I don't expect to be hearing about your blessing scientific squanks!


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