For those incredibly sad Beaker Folk who've been following the Twitter Church of England Synod feed and want to know why we don't have a similar system. First up, of course we do.
And for anyone thinking of a Beaker Handfasting - the charges are as follows.
Handfasting.................... £45
Broomstick-Jumping..... £10
Certificate ...................... £10
March of the Penguins... 20 herrings
Beaker Quire................... £ Free
Beaker Quire Absent...... £20
Sermon ........................... £10 / min
Sermon (pre-loved) ........ £20
Heating (Oil fired) .......... £90
Heating (Dragon fired) ... 3 sheep
Clown Celebrant ............. £90
Humanist Celebrant ....... Free with a real one
Confetti ........................... £15
Locking the "ex" outside. £75
Video ............................... £20
Bouncers ......................... £45
Hoverboard Procession* £50
Fireworks ........................ £200+
Mini bar ........................... Prices as listed
Bowling Alley ................... £5 per game
Fairy Godparent ............... £70
Tea lights .......................... 10p
Golf buggy ........................ £30
Verging on the ridiculous. £30
Lucky stones .................... £10
Lecherous Uncle .............. Ubiquitous
Inter-family fight ............... £100
* £200 deposit, refunded if the hoverboard doesn't explode
Specially love the Quire charges!
ReplyDeleteAre you sure? A couple of lines of the Shipping Forecast seem to have got mixed in with that.
ReplyDeleteI am just imagining a procession of Priest and servers all on Hoverboards. Seeing the video of just one Priest riding his hoverboard was enough to give me apoplexy but a whole procession - wow!
ReplyDeleteI expect Archdruid Eileen gained more enjoyment from writing this post than we did in relation to the somewhat inopportune Synod debate. However, I note that most of the Beaker charges for Handfasting relate to "extras" rather than the ceremony itself.
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