Sunday 31 July 2022

Organist Donors Needed

To inform Beaker Folk of our musical situation today:

Oddric, our accordionist, is on holiday.
Micro, the player of electronic keyboards, is on holiday.
Tandrik, the banjolele player, is on holiday.
Godfrilla, the flautist is on holiday.
All the children, potential players of ocarinae, are on holiday.
The percussion section is on holiday.
Our collection of "1,000 easy hymns for churches without organists" is in 8-track format in a digital world. Which, to be fair, sums up my life.
Which leaves us Young Keith on the spoons.

It is our tradition, in the manner of Psalm 68:25, to publish the processional order of musicians: "In the front are the singers, after them the musicians, and then come the girls with the tambourines".

So here we have it: "In the front is nobody, after them nobody, and then comes Keith with the spoons".

Praise God in the sparse congregation.


  1. Gen. plural of ocarina is surely "ocarinarum"?

    1. Surely ocarinum is the singular

  2. RannedomThoughts9:56 am, August 01, 2022


  3. Your problems echo ours with an absent Organist two Sundays a month. We have an ageing sound system, which plays CD's and timing is everything, totally reliant on the often older than our sound system, to press the right button on either the remote or the CD player console. Often we get the wrong track on the CD which equals the Gradual Hymn, when the Opening Hymn has been announced. It can be a bit haphazard singing a well known hymn to a totally unsuitable tune, and it strains my elderly lungs somewhat as well as throat ache. But unintended consequences render even the worst singer as being on tune, which the majority are off tune.

    A cacophony is the only way to describe it. I often wonder if the God of Musicians is in despair.


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