Acts of Oppression

It's 10.45 on a quiet 4th Sunday of Easter.

In a basement under Lambeth Palace, an alarm rings.

Panicked, the Executive Assistant to the Director of Liturgical Compliance unlocks his computer screen. He screams. 

The Assistant Director of Liturgical Compliance runs into the Liturgical Monitoring Room.

ADLC: What’s happening?

AEDLC: There's a church in Leominster that hasn't used the Acts Reading.

ADLC: But haven't they read what it says?  

"The Fourth Sunday of Easter

https://almanac.oremus.org/2025-05-11

Principal Service
The reading from Acts must be used as either the first or second reading.
Acts 9.36-43
Psalm 23
Revelation 7.9-end
John 10.22-30"

AEDLC: I know. And how did you manage to get a hyperlink into what you said there?

ADLC: Just a little trick I picked up at Mirfield. But we must take action. Where is the Director of Liturgical Compliance?

AEDLC: She's on her post-Easter holiday.

ADLC: Still?

AEDLC: She claimed back all those hours she spent monitoring Easter Vigils to make sure they started after sunset.

ADLC: Lot of clergy caught out this year, with Easter being so late.

AEDLC: Yes. But they're all being... re-educated now.

ADLC: So - I'm in charge. And this gross abuse of liturgical precedent has occurred.

AEDLC: Can't you let it go? Could just be an oversight.

ADLC: And have clergy thinking they can just skip the Acts reading?

AEDLC: Well, it is a bit weird. Why do we have all those post-Pentecost passages being read before Pentecost?

ADLC: That is not the point. You've got to have rules! If we didn't have liturgical rules, where would we be?

AEDLC: St Helen's Bishopsgate?

ADLC: There's nothing for it. How far is the nearest Archdeacon from the church?

AEDLC: Just checking on the Archdeaconscope... covering for the Rector at St Brumington-in-the-Hole.

ADLC: Right. Call out the Archdeancopter. Get him down to Leominster and let him kick some acolytes.

AEDLC: Don't you mean... 

ADLC: I know what I mean. When a church misses the Acts reading after Easter, we've gotta be tough. And, Bernard..

AEDLC: Yes?

ADLC: Tell him to confiscate the Hob Nobs. Custard Creams will be good enough for refreshments for that bunch of rebels.