I. Thou shalt not curse God when the train is late. It's probably the train operators.
II. Thou shalt keep ploughing forwards inside the train once it's started, despite the fact people are walking the other way doing the same thing. These three abide: Faith, Hope and Charity. But hope's the only thing that will keep thee going here.
III. Remember the Sabbath day. Thou dost noy have to go in. Unless thou'rt really unlucky.
IV. Thou shalt not make eye contact.
V. Remember the widow, the orphan, the infirm and aged in the land. But remember also that it's thy seat. Thou gottest on early to grab it. And it's a long way to Reading. Especially since FGW run the service
VI. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's ass. He or she might notice.
VII. Thou shalt let detraining customers detraining before thou dost entrain. Thou hast to have a system, dostn't thou.
VIII. Thou shalt not bear false witness to the ticket inspector. They know.
IX. Thou shalt not sing in the Quiet Carriage. Thou shalt not speak on the phone - not thou, nor thy wife, nor thy maidservant, nor thy ass nor thy ox. For if the Lord looks down from heaven, and hears a clamour as of that of trumpets, then shall he tut.
X. If through a kind employer or the Unions thou getst to work from home one day, don't sit all day in thy pants working on thy laptop. For God can see everything. And so can the neighbours, O thou fool. Thou'rt in the conservatory.