Saturday, 8 February 2014

A Liturgy of Dave

Archdruid Dave: On this "Call Everyone Dave Day", may peace be with Dave.

Dave's: And also with Dave.

Psalms ( A song of King Dave)

The Liturgical Dance of the Eternal Brooms

Naming Ceremony

Archdruid Dave: Name this child?

Dave: Well, if it was a boy we were going to call him Rodney, after Dave. But seeings it's a girl, we're calling her Dave.

Archdruid Dave: Good luck, Dave.

Daves: You're gonna need it.

Hymn: When the Spirit of the Lord is within my heart, I will dance as David danced.

Archdruid Dave: Eww.  Can you please all put your clothes on again?

Daves: Sorry, Eileen - we mean, Dave. Just taking the song seriously.

Archdruid Dave: I've warned you about crude literalism before. And that was literally crude. And in front of little Dave. Lucky she was asleep. Clearly what the songwriter meant - figuratively speaking - is that you should all upset your partners and celebrate killing Philistines and Jebusites.

Daves: Righto, Archdruid Dave.

Archdruid Dave: Now go out into the world, sweep the floor for the kingdom - following the example of Trigger and of Dave Herbert - and be Dave to the world.

Daves: Righto, Dave.

Serious Note: I believe the recent Pancreatic Cancer advertising campaign is crass. The implication of "I wish I had X cancer instead" is insulting, trivialising other cancers and treating their sufferers, the people who die from them and their families with disrespect.

But. Pancreatic cancer is a dreadful disease, which has taken a disproportionate number of creative people. It has a dreadful mortality rate - which could be explained in all sorts of better ways. Let's get behind the fight against all forms of cancer. And wish all the best, on what would have been his 70th birthday, to one of our funniest actors, Roger Lloyd Pack, aka Trigger. May his broom be lifted up, and sweep forever.

Cancer Research UK


  1. The good thing about naming a girl Dave is that it will be shortened to Davina which is a lovely name.

    1. That's true. There's always somebody, ready to change a given name recklessly like that.

  2. I so agree about that misguided campaign. The marvellous Pete Postlethwaite is another whose life was cut short by pancreatic cancer, as was my grandfather's.

  3. I believe Pavarotti also died from this awful type of cancer.
    Roger Lloyd Pack was a wonderful comedy and straight actor, as also was Pete Postlethwaite.
    The campaign is woefully badly worded and should be dropped.
    The millions of us who support the various cancer charities are only too well aware that this disease is dreadful in all its forms.
    RIP this latest famous sufferer and all the others too.

    1. And also Dennis Potter. Who faced it with wit and though,

    2. And if more were needed to show the insensitivity of the campaign, as Potter was dying of pancreatic cancer, he was nursing his wife who died of breast cancer 9 days before his own death!


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