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Sunday, 19 April 2015

A New Vision of Beaker Ministry

I've been jealous of the Green Report the Church of England commissioned from the eminent leader of an eminent bank for quite a while now.

What a great thing, to have a document setting out what is wrong with, and ways forward for, the visionary leaders of your faith movement.

So I commissioned a think tank among the "talent pool" of the Beaker Folk. All of whom, conveniently, are related to me or Hnaef. That is, I arranged to babysit for Celestine and the smaller Hnaefs, while Charlii, Young Keith, Hnaef and Daphne went to the pub, to work out a strategy. 

And when they got back, I showed them the strategy and, them all being in a remarkably affable mood, I'm pleased to say that the Druidic Council (ie the five of us) immediately passed it.

The thing about visionary leadership is, you've got to have time and space to develop your vision. So anyone feeling a "calling" to Druidic ministry in the Beaker Folk will have to agree to spend the next 10 years living in a cave, depending on Food Banks for their survival. This will give them the chance to commune with the Divine and Nature, and know what it is like for normal people, without all those awkward demands on their times that are generated by training; administration skills; learning to be the sort of people who when they speak, the room stops to listen - all that sort of stuff whereby the Church aspires to be like the World.

After 10 years are up, the Druidic candidates will be asked how many people have stopped by to hear their vision, and whether they've managed to avoid the need to develop Mission Strategies, Three point plans, Vision Statements and building projects. If they've passed, they will be allowed to remain in their caves for another 10 years, becoming even wiser. If they've written something calld "Re-envisioning Evangelism in a Post-Millennial Ecosystem" or created plans to build a faith-o-plex or something similar, they will be sent to the Doily Mines.

1 comment :

  1. Harsh, but not as vindictive as the papists, who send their greatest thinkers into exile on Malta

    ReplyDelete

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