Daily Express: "Three-month Siberian Monster-Freeze will grind Britain to a Halt"
Translation: It's gonna be a bit parky.
Luke Robinson: "New Ice Age God's punishment for marriage of gay female bishops"
Translation: It's gonna be a bit parky.
Daily Mirror: "Snowmaggedon!"
Translation: It's gonna be a bit parky.
James Delingpole: New Ice Age coming! Burn the windfarms to keep warm!
Translation: It's gonna be a bit parky.
Guardian: "Cold winters will be a thing of the past with Global Warming"
Translation: It's gonna be a bit parky.
Sun: "Phew, what a Chilla! Three months of Snowpocalypse to come!"
Translation: It's gonna be a bit parky.
Daily Star: "Happy Sexmas! Fifty festive frolics!"
Translation: It's gonna be even colder than normal, for some readers.
Daily Mail: "Immigrants rain like cats and dogs all over the UK, stealing British salt stocks"
Translation: It's gonna be a bit parky.
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