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Tuesday, 15 May 2018

Gammon and (Br)eggs(it)

It has been suggested that calling angry white older people "gammons" is racial abuse.

Now obviously you can have a serious political debate without insulting people and comparing them to tasty cuts of cured meat. In fact it's much better to. But if you are calling someone "gammon" it's not the world's worst slur. I mean. You could do something much rasher.

Much rasher. Never mind.

But maybe you are an older white person who has suffered as a result of being called "gammon"?  Are you worried that your pride in the superiority of the English boiled sweet or bicycle has caused others to discriminate against you?

Then you need our "gammon embitteredness test".

1. Has the Government deported you or anyone like you for being of pink complexion and having a raised blood pressure?

2. Do grumpy men who want to bring back National Service suffer a higher rate of stop and search?

3. If your name is Geoff, are you less likely to get a job interview than if your name is Shahid?

4. If you got a major job in local government, would trolls claim you were using your position to help fellow nominal Christians evade the law?

5. Did thinking that Alf Garnett was one of the 20th Century's leading intellectuals and not a fictional character ever prevent you from being considered for promotion? Well it should have. But I digress.

6. Are you working as a despatch operative in a warehouse in Peterborough despite having been a trained engineer in your native Spalding?

If the answers to questions 1 to 6 are "no", then stop crying. Snowflake.

1 comment :

  1. I have never heard the expression Gammon being applied to those who oppose a soft Brexit. Are you sure that this isn't a media creation? Or alternatively, those extremist re-moaners have created it to disparage those who voted out.

    Off course, is might have been sparked by Borish's outbursts in favour of Brexit, which he tends to fire off half cooked to the Mail (Other extremist publications are available).

    As someone who is politically inept (I support the Green Party) who are against everything, even Nicola Sturgeon.

    They might be a strange lot with straggly beards (Guilty) and no hope of achieving power (but live in hope of Miracles) but they mean well and have the interests of us all at heart (Meaning stop killing the planet through greed and consumption of Gammon) and a bright new future in a socialist paradise. Who could want more?


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