Sunday, 15 July 2012

Member of Church of England "Not in a Pressure Group"

The Church of England was reeling today at the discovery that one of its members is not a member of a pressure group.

Marvin Grundy, 52, of Little Withering, is not a member of WATCH, Forward-in-Faith, Fulcrum, Reform, Changing Attitude, Affirming Catholicism or even its grumpy offshoot, Disapproving Dissent.

Being in a position of total neutrality, with no pre-formed views or vested interests, Mr Grundy is therefore being totally ignored by anybody consulting about anything in the Church of England at the moment. "You know, I just find it less stressful not being a member of pressure groups," said Mr Grundy. "I was a member of the Campaign for Real Ale for a while, but lager's not bad too, so I just kind of let it lapse." 

As a laissez-faire, unpolitical religious non-activist, Mr Grundy attends church on Sunday, receives Communion, has a cup of tea and then goes home. The rest of the week he just tries to get along with people. It is believed there may be more like him - they're just very hard to find.


  1. The lack of Backbone of the Country.

  2. a veritable paradox....... is not being in any group actually de facto belonging to a group? Does he express any preference for the type of tea consummed? English Breakfast? Lapsang Souchon? or the modish 50 shades of Earl Grey?

  3. The problem with belonging to groups is that sooner or later they start expanding their mandate in some awkward way. You join a group with a passionate interest in the music of, say, Vaughn Williams and next thing you know you are either rehearsing a modern Praise Chorus and possibly associated with a movement to have All Vaughn Williams (or possibly, depending on the members, All Praise Choruses) All the Time, and possibly attempts to insist that everyone else sings the same stuff.

    It's better to make up your mind, keep your mouth shut, and work on leading a proper life in your own little circle and let everyone sing what they want.

    Even if it's "Jesse Tree". I can't find a video or lyrics lists of the whole thing, but here's the first verse.

  4. Where do I sign up for Disapproving Dissent?


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