The Alfie Course

Here at the Beaker Folk of Husborne Crawley, every year we run the "Alfie Course". The idea of the "Alfie Course" is to give open-minded enquirers the ability to find out more about Michael Caine. You can come with any views or none - as long as you don't go thinking the Jude Law version of "Alfie" or the remake of "The Italian Job" are in any sense OK.

Each week at the Alfie Course has a different title - starting from "Zulus! Thousands of 'em!" (A good thing on the Alfie Course, due to Zulus being people of an authentic ethnic origin) to the final week's "You were only supposed to bloody give up swearing" - an in-depth discussion on profanity and how best to avoid it.

In theory, being it's for the "fringe" members of the Beaker Folk, you should only do the Alfie Course once. In practice, people find that saying "I am Michael Caine" while looking over thick-rimmed glasses is so fulfilling that they come back and do it every year. And so we are now offering the "Charlie Course" as a follow-up, to unblock the log-jam of amateur Michael Caines. Not a lot of people know that.