Wednesday, 20 November 2013

The Bombshell Falls on Shocked Ears

Shocked and stunned,  Dear Readers.

Shocked and stunned.

When Charlii went through a handfasting with Young Keith, I thought little of it.  Beaker Folk are always holding handfasting ceremonies - they are cheap, convenient, joyful occasions.

Importantly, they also have no legal connotations. Beaker Folk are free to fasten hands with other people of all genders or none. If they go off their handfasted partner they can hold a simple ceremony of Plate-throwing to dissolve the relationship, and go off and fasten hands with another, possibly more suitable, handfastee.

But it does seem wrong, all things considered, that Young Keith has taken advantage of his handfasted situation, actually to have sexual relations with Charlii. I presume this is what has happened.  Obviously there are alternative explanations for her pregnancy, but they would all involve Young Keith looking a lot less pleased with himself than he currently does.

It's not that I hadn't considered the possibility that this sort of thing was going on, of course. What with both living in the same Trainee Archdruid's Suite (a one-bedroom affair) I could imagine something might be going on. But I put it to the back of my mind.

But now the evidence is before us every day. And will become more evident with time  We have an Acting Archdruid who has had sex with a man! How can we take any notice of anything she says, knowing this fact?  What guarantee do we have that, in future, any leadership we are offered is not, in fact, Keith's leadership - where he has used his position to ensure he gets a say? Not that I believe that a man is the head of the household. Oh no. But maybe just a bit. Obviously. I mean, it stands to reason, doesn't it?

But I am bound to Husborne Crawley by deep bonds. Or, to be exact, I am bound to be the Treasurer forever, as Eileen won my soul in that game of poker. I cannot describe the things I imagine, Dear Readers, but my daily nightmare continues.


  1. It's not really a scandal but an unfortunate mistake. Charli obviously forgot herself and took advantage of young Keith, who nearly resisted for all of 30 seconds.

    But being a forgiving sort he having bowed to the inevitable is at least standing by her, which given she is really only and apprentice Arch Druid is really good of him.

    I was looking up the rites of passage for achievement, training and accreditation as an Arch Druid and it does talk of things like fecundity and winter sowing, but this has taken it just a teensie bit too far.

  2. So what's the maternity leave like for trainee Archdruids, then? And does the Moot House have a workplace creche? I think the public deserves to know....

    1. You know how when job adverts say "generous benefits package"?

      The job ad didn't say "generous benefits package".


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