Afraid we've had to seal off the Moot House. After yesterday's "Messy Feast of St Francis de Sales", we realised the Little Pebbles had managed to scatter so much glitter on the tables and floor that, when swept up, it hit critical mass.
Glitter hitting critical mass is in many ways completely dissimilar to uranium doing the same thing. 16 pounds of condensed multi-coloured glitter develops a fabulousness coefficient of anything up to 1015. And this permeates anything within a four mile radius with magical happenings.
Thankfully the Moot House has a spiritual sump set into the Mystic River, and therefore we're able to keep the surrealness to normal levels outside. We're monitoring the unicorns and once their eeriness drops we'll be able to resume normal service.
I have often wondered how glitter manages to survive the depredations of a vacuam cleaner on a daily basis. Messy Church is thankfully not held as often as the organizers would like, but our team of volunteer cleaners curse it's very name. They are finding glitter in the most unlikely places after each occasion it runs, and even up on the lamp shades of the lighting, 12 foot above head level. And don't speak to them about Christmas and New Year? It's strange that all of them seem to take long holidays from the start of Advent to Candle Mass. But this season we've caught them out - we've left the glitter in place until they return, just to see their faces. I expect one or two letters to the Parish Magazine as an outcome.
ReplyDeleteNothing like an Irate Church Cleaner to harangue us. :)