Wednesday 1 September 2010

Constitution, Constitution, Constitution

How often it is said that you can base a church on the Bible and that will make its people holy.  But if you really want it to function properly, the important thing is the Constitution.
I have spent an hour or two today going through the minutes of an earlier phase in our fellowship’s history, and trying to discern how we should move forwards.  The last-but-one pastor was the Revd Obadiah Slowly. He upset a number of members of the fellowship when he claimed there was some doubt as to who wrote the Epistle to the Hebrews.  As a result a vote of no confidence in him, on the grounds that he sowed doubt, was proposed.
Under the Constitution, a vote of no confidence will succeed if more than 50% of eligible church-members that vote (and no less than 30% of all eligible members) vote against the minister. The vote was carried, 29-28 with 16 voters declared incompetent. And Mr Slowly was thereby deprived of his ministry.
But to approve a new minister, at least 66% of voting members (and at least 50% of the congregation) must vote in favour of him or him*. And the followers of Mr Slowly were therefore able to block every single applicant – their 28 votes being easily sufficient to prevent any new minister ever winning his or his* appointment. In any ordinary circumstances the church would have split into two equally godly groups, each bearing the conviction that they were right.   But neither group was prepared to give up Salem Chapel – and so the impasse continued for 17 years. Eventually Mr Slowly died, and his followers subsequently abstained from the vote that allowed Mr Syston Whyte-Plumme to become the next minister.
And the Constitution has never been changed. To do so would require a two thirds majority of the trustees, but one of them has been senile since 1989, two live in New Zealand, one took a vow of silence and the other one believes that changing the constitution would be an act of heresy. It seems that if I want to move forward with constitutional reform, I shall have to do so carefully.

* The Constitution is full of these strange wordings. At one stage there was a failed attempt to put it all into inclusive language. But instead of removing the “or her” clauses, somebody just ran a “change all” on their computer, changing all “her” to “his”. There is a strange little appendix to the Constitution that explains that “he, his or him” can also include “she, her or her” – except where it can’t for sound Scriptural reasons.

8 comments :

  1. There's no option to declare all would be challengers to be heretics and suggest they attend the church of the infinitely deep furnace in hell? I would think any families questioning your leadership would be well lead by the man or man of the house to find such an alternate congregation! Good luck w/ the reform. I think any constitutional changes should include a full ban on blue covered Bibles as well.

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  2. Considering that the previous members, (priests and kings, mind you) did not see fit to change, willy-nilly to follow the world's quick pace, shouldn't you proceed by giving the remaining trustees a vote of confidence? You must remember that you were called to this church, the Constitution supported that, the members, in sanctity, approved it and therefore it is of sanctity itself.

    I see that Brother Miller is tempting you to follow modern political practices as well as encouraging rainbow Bibles. You might consider that well in your decision on which counsel to listen to. He even insinuates that heretics can form a church to attend! Finally, he is wishing you "luck", which all and sundry know is a teaching from the devil and goes back to the ancient idol, "Fortuna."

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  3. I've been discovered. I'll be reading my rainbow colored NIV representative of the Ark in which God saved the remnant righteous of humanity from the evil wickedness besetting them on every side until such time as the good Rev'd Parslow deem fit to expel me. I suspect will be dealing w/ the wiley characters on the Baptibus for far too long to have time to worry about my rainbow colored NIV.

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  4. I think it is rather sad that in all Baptist churches I have belonged to it is much easier to get rid of a pastor than to call a pastor.
    How is this Christian?

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  5. I'm a little disturbed the Brother Anonymous would question the behavior of a Baptist congregation in good standing. :)

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  6. I'm glad that are at least a few righteous left in your congregation who would not stand the corruption of doubt to be sown in your midst.

    I pray health to their bowels.

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  7. It's Sister Anonymous, actually, and until recently my husband was a Baptist pastor.

    I know most comments here are tongue-in-cheek, but my comment above was a genuine one.

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  8. @Anonymous. Was definitely just having some fun. There's lots of unchristian behavior in churches, and constitutions that have horrible ideas/policies. I'm pretty sure the good Rev'd Drayton has entirely made this one up though as a spoof of some of the absurdities that do exist in the real world and are genuinely "unchristian".

    Darrell has the greatest comments ever on here. I'm still laughing the next day about "praying health to their bowels".

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