All of a sudden, controversial thinkers are all over the place, thinking the unthinkable, saying the un-sayable, safe in the knowledge that even this government isn't so stupid as to take any notice of them - and then they can claim they were right all along.
So I am pleased to welcome home-grown free-thinker, contrarian and Edge-Lord of the Flies, Toby Hitchin, to give us a view on the freedoms we should be demanding on the other side of lockdown - AE.
As I predicted when the Government first implemented this lockdown, the number of fatalities in this country has stabilised and the number of people in hospital suffering from Covid19 is falling. That this has happened at exactly the time you would expect, is proof that I was right when I said all the fears were overblown. The Government's so-called scientists said that if we did nothing, there would be hundreds of thousands of deaths if we did nothing. This has clearly been proven wrong, as there have been nothing like that number of deaths. Instead it turns out this disease only affects the old, the Prime Minister, all his friends and some other people. None of whom are me. I reminds me of the Year 2000 so-called bug, where we were told that computer programmers had to spend years fixing the issue. That there were very few problems when the millennium arrived proved that the programmers were wasting their time.
Compare this to the Land of the Free, where Alex Jones of Infowars has been filmed proving that 5G does not cause Coronavirus, by using a megaphone to blast the alleged virus at his followers as quickly as possible. This is the kind of freedom-loving stupidity that goes to the heart of being a member of a democracy. Yes, the protestors on the streets of various States may catch the virus, go home and infect vulnerable family members who then are terribly ill or die. But that is their right in a free country.
It now seems that, in this country, the Government is waking up to the damage it is doing by belatedly trying to stop everyone dying of a disease. Obviously, their idea of a lockdown being lifted in phases is just more evidence of a nanny state. But we must assume that, at some point in the future, we will all be let out into whatever freedom the police decide we can be allowed. And at that point we must face one of the burning issues of democracy. One I have repeatedly demanded the Government address, and yet they continue to ignore. Why, in what is supposed to be a free country, are we not allowed to throw Javelins in shopping centres?
It is surely a simple case of individual freedom. Why, as a free-born English man, living in a sovereign country that has thrown off the shackles of the European Union, am I not allowed to take a few javelins - my own javelins, paid for with my own wages - down to what may one day again be a crowded shopping centre in my spare time - my spare time, I stress - and throw them around?
I know what the nay-sayers will say. They will say "Nay". That is, after all, what they do. But to them I say, "Aye". And also "I". I demand this freedom. And the Elf 'n' Safety brigade may say to me, javelins are dangerous. But I put to you this simple statistical fact.
In the last 20 years, there have been no injuries in shopping centres caused by people throwing javelins. But in the same time period, hundreds of people have tripped over shopping bags, toddlers have sustained nosebleeds by walking into walls, and people have fallen down escalators and been trapped in lifts.
And does anyone suggest banning shopping bags, toddlers or escalators? I believe I have made my point. All of these activities are statistically more dangerous than throwing javelins around. And yet only one activity is banned.
So I call on the government once again. Give me back this inalienable human right to throw javelins around in shopping centres.
Please support this blog
Impeccable logic.
ReplyDelete