Saturday 5 February 2022

The Red Kite Chronicles - BTL responses

I was watching the red kites swirling over Top Meadow earlier. Amazing, beautiful birds with that haunting whistle for a call.

You know, I often think that the red kite could be the Beaker Folk equivalent of the Celtic "Wild Goose". Free, beautiful, graceful, signifying the "otherness" of a God that can be both of our world, and yet out of our reach. When we watch a red kite circling beyond our reach - always just out of the shot of a decent photo, as often proven by the Karen Lewis Wildlife Photography Facebook Group - are we not brought out of ourselves?

What sights can the red kite see, we wonder? How must the world look to one that, in its stillness, can yet see the smallness of human beings? What thoughts must pass through the mind of that creature that sees the map of the landscape drawn out below them?

Townmouse 18:53 

They are lovely birds. But be careful! One took a sandwich out of my hands in Marlow. I'm not going back to Marlow.

Roddyrick 18:54 

People think they're harmless. But I heard about one taking the toupee of an old chap's head in Swindon. He was scared to go out after that.

Jeremiah 18:55 

I heard they can break a swan's arm with one blow of their necks.

VaxIsDeath32323 18:56 

Bill Gates has programmed them to spread the so-called "Omicron" virus in their droppings so he can put micro-transmitters in your arm. Which will then attract more kites. Spreading more Omicron. Until we reach the Omega point where there are more kites than people, and then they will take over. Wake up, sheeple!

ArnoldSame 18:58 

I took my Pekinese, Mr Whoozy, out for a walk and one was hovering overhead. It obviously thought Mr Whoozy would make a tasty morsel. They are natural-born killers.

Random Ralph 18:59 

I went for a walk in the countryside and they were circling over, waiting to pick my bones clean if I died of sunstroke. I was so scared of them I walked into a hedge and had to be rescued by the local dogging society. This is all Nick Clegg's fault. And the kites. That's their evil plan.

VaxIsDeath32323 19:02 

@Random Ralph - just beware of dogging societies. I was a member for several years and now I daren't look the vicar in the eye.

Roundsmith 19:05 

I heard about red kites in the East End. They form gangs and steal cars. If you find secret chalk markings outside your house, it was probably a kite. My nan used to know the Krays and she said there was no red kites in the East End back then. Reggie would eat them in a white bread sandwich. With jellied eels, of course. He was a gentleman.

Chavsopolitan 19:06 

Saw six kites fly away carrying a sheep between them. This is why if you see a sheep on its own, you should always take it home and hide it in the garage. I've got several of them but now I'm living in fear of the Young Farmers' Society. And I've run out of lawn to feed them.

FluffyBun 19:08 

I notice since red kites have been back in the countryside, the number of Curly Wurly bars in circulation has reduced. Coincidence? I think not. 

EUSSR Mafia 19:12 

@Jeremiah These "red" kites are a commie / woke / EU plot. Back when I was a kid we had red white and blue, patriotic kites. They would never attack Her Majesty's swans.

Lord Heh Heh 19:17 

I remember back when red kites assisted the Nazis to invade Belgium. Never trusted them since.

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