Friday 18 February 2022

Beating The Evil Out With Sticks

The Beaker Folk have been getting increasingly concerned that we will no longer be allowed to beat the evil out of people with sticks. 

Beating the evil out with sticks has always been a part of Beaker Culture. Going back 5,000 years, whenever we needed to get evil out of someone we would beat them with sticks.

And we would never beat people with sticks if they didn't want it. All the people being beaten with sticks have made it clear that it is exactly the sort of thing you need to get the evil out.

There is a strong body of evidence that beating people with sticks works. And even when it doesn't, it's the fault of the beatees. Not the beaters. They are doing the best job they can with the tools available to them*.

So we demand our ancient rights to beat people with sticks to drive the evil out.

Beating people with sticks to drive the evil out. You know it makes sense.


* sticks


1 comment :

  1. Reminds me of my School Days in East London, where beating with Sticks (or Canes) was the normal punishment for infringement of any rules. And it wasn't asked for, but to be honest was preferable to long detentions or calling your parents in, when you knew that you would get worse when you got home. I don't believe it was a viable punishment, it was basically child cruelty, but seemed to be accepted as normal. "Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child" seemed to be the mantra. Corporal Punishment it was described as, but when I was a Corporal in the Army, I never had any power to punish, that was reserved for Commanding Officers, who could give Janker's, fines Show Parades or detention. But used sparingly, preference being for personal self discipline to be part of the behaviour management of military discipline, and the beating with sticks was abandoned hundreds of years before Execution for Desertion in the Face of the enemy was. Go figure?

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