Tuesday, 2 April 2013

Nativity of Brian Glover (1934-1997)

Archdruid: Keith! Will you stop faffing about with that kestrel?

(Panicked flapping)

Keith: Ey up, Kes!

Archdruid: I read a book once.

All: Green, it were.

A small car screeches up the drive, with a mattress strapped to the roof. A terrified old man is clinging to the mattress. As the driver slams the brakes on, the old man flies over a hedge, colliding with an old man and a peroxide blonde who are smooching behind it.

Archdruid: Ogden Butterclough, tha's a barmpot.

All: Tha's been tekkin' a sherry out o' wedlock. Ogden.

Ogden: Just because I've been indulging in  some freelance underwriting with a certain Mrs Dugdale of 22, The Crescent...

Archdruid: Of course, Brian Glover started off as a wrestler.

Compo: Oo, I love a grapple. That Nora's a lass wi' nowt tekken out.

Nora: And you're definitely not taking me out.


All: Bless thee, Bottom! Bless thee! Thou art translated!

Gaffer: Tetley make tea bags, make tea.


  1. Is that 'tekken' a reference to one of those GODLESS VIDEO GAMES? Me, I prefer Japanese RPGs rather than fighting games.

    love Maggie xxx

    1. 'Twas really my pathetic attempt at transliterating the Ancient Yorkshire tongue (pron. "tong").


Drop a thoughtful pebble in the comments bowl