Tuesday, 7 February 2012

What Would Jesus Hunt?

Just when I thought this was all over last November, what happens but John Piper and Mark Driscoll, whoever they are, have inspired the numpties of the community to go and prove how manly they are.

It's a problem. Between the dodgy knees, excess weight and arthritis, they weren't going to do anything reckless like play football or anything. And Burton Dasset's suggestion that they have a manly game of bridge had few takers - even when he explained how dashing and aggressive it was to bid Weak 2s.

And they're scared of the local squirrels and badgers since last time they went out into the landscape to do manly things. So instead, in the manner of manly men of the past, they went round to Drayton Parslow's for a fry-up. I always like to think there's nothing manlier than a bunch of blokes wrestling with nature in the raw, in the shape of a rasher of well-cured bacon or a free range egg.

Still, the trouble with this manly behaviour is it's so high-risk. I suppose it's the old "winner takes all" nature of the Y-chromosomed - in evolutionary terms, it's either make yourself successful and attractive to mates, or you might as well die trying. Which in practical terms this tea-time meant poor Marston got hit with fat when an egg spat in the pan. Poor dear, he ran it under the cold tap for ten minutes but he still thinks it may blister.

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