Tuesday, 2 June 2020

Liturgy for Thomas Hardy's Birthday

Yokel 1: It's that Thomas Hardy's birthday then.

Yokel 2: Aye. Dead and gone as we all shall be.

Y1: Shall us go to the Pure Drop?

Y2: It's closed for lockdown.

Y1: Shall us go for a drap o' sommat at Peter's Finger?

Y2: Closed for lockdown.

Y1: What about the Quiet Woman?

Y2: Closed for lockdown.

Y1: Dree Mariners at Casterbridge? I hear they had a pretty drap o' tipple.

Y2: Closed for lockdown.

Y1: Shall us go jump off Durdle Door? 

Y2: Aye, it's a sunny day. Wi' all my heart. 

Y1: What's the point o' being the village idiots if we can't act like it?

Y2: Shall us get Tranter Cummings to take us in his cart?

Y1: What? Wi' his eyesight?



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