In memoriam - Leslie Nielsen 1926-2010

Although the great Leslie Nielsen has left the departure lounge,  Dr Rumack and Lt Frank Drebin are with us always. So we were glad to welcome them to join us today for our commemoration.


Introit: the Beaker People arrive by driving up to the Moot House too fast and crashing their cars into fire hydrants and dustbins.


Archdruid: Having heard the sad news we're holding this memorial.


All: A memorial? What is it?

Dr Rumack: It's a service for remembering dead people, but that's not important right now.

Liturgy of loss

Burton: A parachute not opening... that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine... having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go!


Drebin: It's the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girls dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.


All: Goodyear?


Drebin: No, the worst.

Confession

Archdruid: Oh, my poor Nordberg! He was such a good man, Frank. He never wanted to hurt anyone. Who would do such a thing?

Drebin: It's hard to tell. A gang of thugs, a blackmailer, an angry husband, a gay lover...

Drebin clears his belongings prior to departing to the next life.

Drebin:Hey! The missing evidence in the Kelner case! My God, he really was innocent!

All: He went to the chair 24 years ago, Frank.

READING


Drayton Parslow: And Jacob awaked out of his sleep, and he said, Surely the LORD is in this place; and I knew it not.

Dr Rumack: Yes, the Lord was in that place. And don't call me Shirley.

At this point, Kylie, or, as it may be, Kayleigh may carry a fine specimen of the North American mammal Castor Canadensis into the Moot House.


Drebin: Nice....

Archdruid:.. Don't. Just don't.


Archdruid: I flew single engine fighters in the Air Force, but this plane has four engines. It's an entirely different kind of flying altogether.


All: It's an entirely different kind of flying.

Valediction

Archdruid: Leslie, I just want to tell you good luck. We're all counting on you.

Blessing

Drebin:It's a topsy-turvy world, and maybe the problems of a few people don't amount to a hill of beans. But this is our hill. And these are our beans!

-Today's Supper - Lasagne -