The Previous Pastor Comparison Form

An interesting diversion for me today. My former chapel of Frisby-on-Soar, Leicestershire, has sent me their Previous Pastor Comparison Form. My erstwhile followers from my previous career may recall that Frisby was the village within which I trampled the grain in my previous post, until they gnashed their teeth at me and the idle mockers mocked when I inadvertently confused the breed of hart common in ancient Israel.

I realise I should explain. When I had been at Frisby for just six short weeks, they presented me with the Previous Pastor Comparison Form. At the time I did not mention it. I will be honest, brothers and sisters (suitably screened by a legitimate and godly male companion from the revelation that is about to come). It hurt my pride. I was shocked by the form, and also by the comparison it made with my predecessor,Revd Syston Whyte-Plumb.

Category	Revd Syston Whyte-Plumb	Revd Drayton Parslow
Godliness	8	6
Temperance	9	3
Cheerfulness	10	2
Biblical Faithfulness	9	4
Punctuality	9	3
Work with Children	10	1
Pastoral commitment	9	4
Preaching	10	2
Wife's Dress sense	9	4
Chairing meetings	7	2
Prophetic Talents	9	2
Inspiration and Discernment	10	3
Quality of Wife's Teas	9	1
Cleanliness of Manse	8	3
Wife's leadership of Women's Group	10	3
Approachability	8	2
Leadership	8	3
Attractiveness of Wife	8	2
Overall	8	3

When I received this form I was quite shocked. Partly because of my low scores compared to Revd Syston Whyte-Plumb (whose cheerfulness was only caused by his lack of temperance, in my own non-judgemental opinion). Partly because his wife's scores were surprising when he was not actually married - not that I would like to suggest he had a tendency towards abomination, but he was very definitely a bachelor of the parish. But mostly because I was shocked that a congregation could even compare pastors in this way.

So, as I say, today I was surprised to receive the following scorecard "for my information", as the elders of Frisby put it.

Category	Revd Drayton Parslow	Revd Barkby Thorpe
Godliness	9	5
Temperance	10	4
Cheerfulness	9	3
Biblical Faithfulness	9	1
Punctuality	10	2
Work with Children	8	2
Pastoral commitment	8	2
Preaching	10	3
Wife's Dress sense	10	3
Chairing meetings	9	1
Prophetic Talents	8	3
Inspiration and Discernment	9	1
Quality of Wife's Teas	8	2
Cleanliness of Manse	9	2
Wife's leadership of Women's Group	8	2
Approachability	9	1
Leadership	10	4
Attractiveness of Wife	7	3
Overall	8	3

Obviously, I am pleased to see that I have scored better overall - perhaps I improved in my last six weeks in Frisby. And I have yet to meet the Revd Barkby Thorpe. And it is wrong of me to judge, of course. But it strikes me that he must be an appalling and ungodly shambles.