This is the day before the feast of Christ the King features Jesus's parable of the Sheep and the Goats. Thus giving two lots of woolly animals for the price of one. And every Sunday Club, Messyeqsque Church and All Age Service with a Bit of Craft in It realises that the simple, easy and above all reliable thing to do in these circumstances is to do Cotton Wool Sheep and Goats.
I've a bit of a problem with the sheep and goat that the Little Pebbles are going to be sticking cotton wool to tomorrow. They've pinched them (legally - it's copyright free) off Clker Clipart - which sounds like a dating app for Sunday School leaders, but isn't.
In fact, I have no trouble with the sheep. It's the goat.
Trouble is, that goat is just too cute. I mean, I know it's got a devilish beard. But really? Who's gonna believe anyone is sending that goat to Hell?
So anyway. My other problem is how they're using it. They've printed it off on a series of sheets of A0 card, so large it's occupying the entire back wall of the Moot House. Anyone dropping in tomorrow morning is going to think we're a bunch of extremely kitsch Satanists.
And the sheer amount of cotton wool to make that particular creature and its sheepy mate woolly? They've backed a juggernaut full of cotton balls up next to the Moot House, ready for tomorrow's outbreak of sticking. I tell you, there's enough out there to take off the make up of every contestant on Strictly Come Dancing.
So have a happy Cotton Wool Saturday. And don't forget - the goats may be cute, but they're evil.
Want a good laugh? Want to laugh at the church? Want to be secretly suspicious that the author has been sitting in your church committee meetings taking notes? Then Writes of the Church: Gripes and grumbles of people in the pews is probably the book for you. An excellent book for your churchgoing friends, relatives or vicar. And don't forget it's nearly Christmas! |
I've often thought that the allegoric use of Sheep and Goats is a little cruel and unkind to both creatures, sentient beings as per Michael Gove. I of course wonder if Michael Gove is a sentient being, given his performance as Secretary of State for Education, Tory Party, Traitor in Chief and now, Secretary of State for the Environment, where his Tory credentials regarding Climate Change are really challenged.
ReplyDeleteTime for a new Gove methinks.