A Lament for Let-Down Lib Dems

Upon Shigionoth


Out of the depths of despair we cry
From the pit we call for help.

For the thing we feared has come upon us
and disaster has fallen upon us.

For surely we desired opposition
and to fight against all things regressive.
Knowing that opposition was easy
and cheap soundbites sweet to the ears.

So we cleaved unto our comedy leaders even when they were drunk

following their doddery footsteps when they were older than Methusaleh. 

But woe to us for we said we would work with other parties
and now our bluff is called.

For if we only said we would work with Labour then surely we should have joined them
and if we claimed to be "progressive" where else could we go?
But now to our right we see a smirking Osborne
and to our left David Cameron, stealing our clothes.

Yet we came not into politics to cut benefits
nor even to raise VAT.
Rather we would liberalise drug laws
and gladly scrap Trident.
Or better still wear our duffel coats
and march against tuition fees.

And yet where we thought we had libertarian friends
still they search the ISP records of our enemies
lest they should utter sedition
or accuse David Cameron of gaining weight.

Behold where we wanted to look after babes and sucklings,
yea surely we removed their benefits in the darkness of our hearts,
bringing quangos to ruin
and building aircraft carriers without planes.

Surely pointless wind turbines shall follow me all the days of my life
and I shall dwell in the House of Lords
we're all in it together
- forever.