Liturgy of an Almost Spring Like Day in England

Archdruid: Rejoice! For Spring is springing!

Hnaef: Barbie! Barbie! Barbie!

All: The lambs are skipping! The birds are singing!

Hnaef: Barbie! Barbie! Barbie!

Archdruid: The breeze is light, the fields are green.

Hnaef: Barbie! Barbie! Barbie!

All: The cruël frost's no longer seen.

Hnaef: Barbie! Barbie! Barbie!

Archdruid: The bunnies skip, the robins' eggs hatching.

Hnaef: Barbie! Barbie! Barbie!

All: And in the fields the Beaker Fertility Folk are matching...

Hnaef: Barbie! Barbie! Barbie!

Archdruid: Hnaef, are you trying to suggest we have a Beaker Barbecue tonight?

Hnaef: Well, now you mention it...

Archdruid: We now sing hymn 43...

Hymn 43

All things bright and beautiful
All creatures great and small
All things fat and protein-full
We like to eat them all.

Each chicken in the garden
The little lamb at play
The pigeons in the meadow
They'll never get away.

All things bright and beautiful....

The turkey that makes twizzlers
The cow makes steaks so rare
Don't look out for the piglets
Cos they're no longer there.

All things bright and beautiful...

Archdruid: So light up the fire.

All: And let the meat burn.

Hnaef: Go in meat.

All: We'll get the beer in.