Want to support this blog?

Want a good laugh? Want to laugh at the church? Want to be secretly suspicious that the author has been sitting in your church committee meetings taking notes? Then Writes of the Church: Gripes and grumbles of people in the pews is probably the book for you.

From Amazon, Sarum Bookshop, The Bible Readers Fellowship and other good Christian bookshops. An excellent book for your churchgoing friends, relatives or vicar. By the creator of the Beaker Folk.

Thursday, 26 October 2017

Exploding Nemo

"We need to find the causes of this Transgender Explosion," declares Norman Tebbit in the Telegraph.

Meanwhile in the Mail, those who write below the line are getting excited about a BBC programme showing a fish changing gender:
Reporting on fish changing sex is science, not politics. It doesn't really apply to humans, as the ability of most humans spontaneously to change our more - ahem - developed sex organs is remarkably limited. But the Mail readers' suspicion is that it is all part of the "transgender explosion."

I'm really hoping those Mail readers haven't watched Finding Nemo. As we all know, Nemo is a clownfish. And as those who watch QI know, clownfish are able to change from male to female.

What happens is that they are all originally male. When the oldest female dies or disappears, the most dominant male becomes female. They then mate with the next most dominant male. So for Finding Nemo to reflect clownfish accurately, Nemo's dad is now his mum - Coral, his biological Mum, having been eaten. I presume the scene where Martin turns into Martine is in some kind of special "adults-only" version of Finding Nemo that is not on general release.

Somebody really ought to bring it out. The Mail Online would probably melt. Or possibly explode.

Looking for  a Christmas present for the churchgoer in your life? Or are you in need of a book to make you laugh at and think about the church? Well you probably need "Writes of the Church  -  Gripes and Grumbles of People in the Pews" - a perfect stocking filler.  From Amazon, BRF and good Christian bookshops.
A queue of people at the vicarage door, holding letters. The vicar is hiding behind the curtains.
Writes of the Church - On sale now and perfect for Christmas


  1. Flashlight Annie26/10/2017, 18:17

    I hadn't realised that changing gender could cause one to explode.

    1. Oh yeah. If this transgenderising takes on there will be people exploding all over the place.

  2. We all start from the same genetic blue-print, which is why Norman Tebbit has nipples (i.e. a female characteristic). Maybe he should reflect on that and the non-binary nature of human morphology. On second thoughts, he's a Tory MP so maybe not.


Drop a thoughtful pebble in the comments bowl