Sunday 31 December 2017

Liturgy for the First Sunday after Christmas

Visiting Lay Preacher: The Lord be with you

Visiting Ocarinist: And also with you.

VLP: Where's the organist?

VO: Having a rest after Christmas. Where's the normal minister?

VLP: Having a rest after Christmas. Where's the normal replacement organist?

VO: Playing at all the other churches. Where's this church's Lay Preacher?

Nope, no choir either

VLP: Having a rest after Christmas. Where's the Wardens?

VO: Gone away to see their kids. Where's the other Lay Preacher they get in on the week after Easter?

VLP: Lanzarote. Shall we kick off the hymns?

VO: What have you picked?

VLP: Once in Royal?

VO: Too tricky.

VLP: O Come All Ye Faithful?

VO: Bit Christmassy?

VLP: We Three Kings?

VO: Too long. It brings on my panic attacks.

VLP: What can you actually play?

VO: Abba Father.

VLP: OK, let's go for it...

VO: Where's the congregation?

Ghosts: Having a rest after Christmas.

VLP:  Shall I skip the sermon?

VO: Please.

VLP: OK.  Let's go home.  Happy New Year.

VO: And also with you.

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From Amazon, Sarum Bookshop, The Bible Readers Fellowship and other good Christian bookshops. An excellent book for your churchgoing friends, relatives or vicar. By the creator of the Beaker Folk.

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