The Complete Guide to "When Is it Christmas" One-upmanship

John Lewis ad - mid November

President of the United States - "Merry Christmas!" on 1st December

Methodists: "Pah! It's not even Advent until Sunday! It's not Christmas until the Carol Service on the 10th" (opening door on Advent Calendar) 

Anglicans: "Rubbish! It's not Christmas until Christmas Eve!"

Catholics: "Sunset on Christmas Eve, I reckon."

Strictly 1st to 31st December

Anglo-Catholics: "Midnight Mass."

People with Massive Displays of Bling on their houses that you can see from space:  "From 1st December to 31st at midnight."


Greek Orthodox: "What do you mean? That's not even Christmas Eve!"

Roy Wood: "I wish it could be Christmas every day."

Small children who are now middle-aged: "When the kids start singing and the bands begin to play?"

People in Retail: "Really, Christmas starts some time in the previous January, when we start planning. And goes on forever."

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Want a good laugh? Want to laugh at the church? Want to be secretly suspicious that the author has been sitting in your church committee meetings taking notes? Then Writes of the Church: Gripes and grumbles of people in the pews is probably the book for you. An excellent book for your churchgoing friends, relatives or vicar. And don't forget it's nearly Christmas!